Sunday, April 15, 2012

Going Back

I had posted that Eviee was pretty well all on formula since my surgery. It really wasn't all from the surgery, Id say she was already starting to self wean either way she was pretty well done. A friend had asked me how breast feeding was going and I told her that my milk had pretty well dried up! I was so sad. I tried not to be. In the beginning I told myself that she would NEVER have formula and then we had to start, but still being able to nurse some made me happy. So at that point I said as long as I can breastfeed till she is eight months old . I thought that wasn't going to happen either because I had already started on The Lap Band and thought that I would have it by the time she was five months old and wasn't sure if I would be able to still make milk after that. Then when my surgery finally got approved we had been nursing for eight months. Someone had told me that it was just meant to be. I wanted to nurse for eight months and did so now its time to move on. So I bought some formula and just told myself to be happy with giving her the best for eight months. But deep down I was so upset. I wanted the best for her for as long as possible. Well a week after surgery I started nursing again. Eviee took right to it as though nothing had ever changed. But then about two days later she changed her mind. No way was she nursing anymore. So here we were again with formula. This I mind you is the first time she has ever been solely on formula and I hated it!!!! Then last night something came over me that said NO she wasn't done I wasn't going to let her. LOL So I have been pumping and taking fenugreek ALOT for the last 24 hours and of course offering the breast to Eviee but she still is sold on it again but I'm not going to give up. Formula is not going to win!!! LOL

Sorry for the rambling but its just how it is in my head! LOL

Monday, April 9, 2012

If I only knew

If I only knew that childhood was going to go by so fast I would have enjoyed it more.

If I only knew that my siblings would one day be my best friends I would have liked them more when we were younger. LOL

If I only knew that one morning my parents would tell me they were splitting up I wouldn't have came to the table.

If I only knew how hard my mother worked to take care of four children by herself, I would have been a better daughter.

If I only knew that my mother was going to marry a cowboy one day, I would have bought her
cowgirl boots for mothers day! LMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

If I only knew that  your first love doesn't last forever, I would have never put my heart out there.

If I only knew that I would end up hating the career I went to school for, I would have saved my money.

If I only knew that he would be the worst person I would ever meet I wouldnt have wasted so many years of my life.

If I had only knew that he was going to be the man I married I wouldn't have waited to long to tell him hi. :)

If I only knew that one day a dear friend would pass so soon I would have been a better friend.

If I only knew the winning lotto numbers then I would be rich by now damn it!!!!!!

If I only knew that having a baby would change my life so much I would... OK I wouldn't change that. Eviee came at the most perfect time in my life! I <3 you Eviee.

If I only knew that one day I would want a career that paid alot I would have went to college right out of high school.

If I only knew how to make money from home I would never think about going back to work... in five years LOL

If i only knew that my momma was always right I would have always listened!

8 months

 I can not believe that I have a 8 month old! Really???? Seems like yesterday we found out that we were having a girl and now here we are... my baby is 8 months old!

Eviee now weighs about 18 lbs according to my scale.

She is eating solids three times a day now. And loving it!!!!

We are using a sippy cup. Not all the time but every couple of days I will give it to her with some water and she will drink it.

We have decided to wait until she is a year to start any other form of liquid besides breast milk and water what little formula she gets.

We have moved her to the crib in her room :( this makes me so very sad but I know that it is time.
We have a Summer day and night monitor in there so I can see her all night long. :)

She is so funny!!! She laughs at everything!!!! She's doing this new thing where she laughs smiles and squints her nose all at once... SO FREAKING CUTE!!!!!!

She is so loving. She is always giving kisses and hugs!

She loves any kind of stuffed animals.

She isn't crawling yet and honestly Sean and I think that she is going to skip crawling and go straight to walking! She is just so stinking smart crawling is for those average babies LOL JK But she is scooting all over the place.

She pulled herself up holding on to the crib the other day. I could not believe it. I sat her in the crib so I could find her something to wear and when I turned around there she was standing and laughing me. Blew me away!

We put her down with the dogs the other day to see how she did, not to bad. That night she got a little yucky but nothing like it has been so I'm hoping this means she is getting over her allergy.

We are joining a play group next month. So excited!!!!! Eviee loves other babies and kids, I think she will love to have some friends.

She is still not a big napper. She does sleep almost all night but still just little cat naps during the day. But I don't mind I miss her when she is sleeping. :)

I have ever mentioned that I call her "noodle"??? We'll I do. I have called her that since she was born, OK well it started out as "pumpkin noodle" and then I dropped the "pumpkin" so she is my"noodle"!!!  LOL I love my noodle.

Eviee is totally in love with her daddy! She thinks he is the best thing EVER!!!! Her little eyes just light up when she sees him. Melts my heart!

She hates to have blankets on her. She will do whatever it takes to kick them off.

She is becoming a stomach sleeper like her mommy.

She started waving "HI" last week. She has a very prissy wave. Wonder where she got it from????

Well I'm a little late getting this posted so a few things have change since I had my surgery....

Eviee is pretty much on formula now. I was on pain meds for over a week and a half so I couldn't nurse and I really didn't feel like pumping considering I never get any that way anyways. Now I have nursed her a couple of times these last couple of days but only at night before she goes to bed. We considered getting donated milk but neither Sean or I really felt 100% comfortable with that so. I told myself that I would be happy so long I could nurse until she was 8 months and I did. So instead of being mad at myself I am going to be happy. Most woman don't even make it a month so I think I did good. I will continue to nurse her when and if she wants to but I'm not going to stress myself out over it.

Eviee is back in our room and in our bed. So many things were different for her when I had my surgery (being away from me all day/night, not being able to hold her for a couple of days and then only for a few minutes, not be able to nurse and so on) that she would not sleep in her crib. So she is now  as we speech in mommy and daddy's bed. Once I get all healed up and am able to reach back down in her crib then we will move her back to her room but until then....

Naps the past two weeks have been really good. She has been sleeping anywhere from 2-4 hours but I know this is only because I am in the bed with her. I'm still so tried and hurting that by noon Ive had all I can have and must lay down. And since I'm back to caring for her by myself during the day she must come with mommy :)

I say this every post but Eviee is the sweetest, funniest, smartest little baby. I am completely amazed by how much I love her. My love for her grows every second. I find myself just starring at her. I have watched many babies grow but watching my child grow and learn new things and change daily has me in ahh. I cant really describe it... something only a parent knows that's for sure. This child is the greatest gift I have ever received. I am so thankful for her. She is my sweet little angel.

Friday, April 6, 2012


Im still in pain but it is getting better

I have lost 11 pounds as of this morning!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I will be glad when I can sleep on my stomach again

My clothes are already fitting sooooo much better

Eviee amazes me everyday.

I can not beleive how much I love her.  It is way beyond anything I have ever experienced!

I have the best husband in the world! Be jealous! HAHA

I have some goals.... Loose 80lbs by the end of this year. , actually attend the play group I joined a month ago, start jogging, read six books by the end of this year, I want to learn to love to bake (healthy of course) and some other things but thats for me to know :)

I really have learned who my friends are.

I cant breastfeed anymore due to the surgery and im not going to beat myself up over it

I cant believe that this Oct Sean and I will have been together five years!!!!!!

Im so ready for my stomach to calm down so that I can have a Red bull, it has been over a year since I had one and I love them LOL

Sean told me that it is up to me weather or not we would have another child. So I  made up my mind that I do not want another one and then this morning he actually came out and told me that he really does want another one. Not really sure how I feel about it I kinda laughed it off posted a fb status but honestly I really dont think im gonna change my mind.

Someone from my past has really been on my mind ALOT lately, so much so that I have been dreaming about that person. Dont you hate that. I dont even talk to them and yet cant them off my mind.

Im excited to get Eviees new diaper bag. Hopefully  Ill get it tomorrow.

We are having a bbq at my moms tomorrow. Love being around all of my family!

My next blog I have decided is going to be on being a step mom.....

And to come I will do my best to get Eviees 8 month post up soon. I need to upload pictures for it and everytime I do my computer messes up.

We are going to Texas in June for Seans family reounion. Its been about ten years since he went to one.

I guess thats about it.

Dont you just LOVE this picture of Eviee!!!!!!