Monday, March 31, 2014

TWO YEAR OLDS DONT KEEP

I have a two year old. TWO! Life is always crazy and busy and crazy busy. My husband works a lot. And I run a boutique which really is a full time job. Life is nuts some days and some days I wish I had someone to keep Eviee for the night or two or a week. HA! Some days I really miss my husband. I miss conversations that don't involve baby dolls, or Frozen movies. I miss going out to eat without having to take a two year old to the potty every FIVE SECONDS! I miss taking random naps during the day. I miss sleeping in past 7am. I miss sleeping a solid 8 hours or more a night. I miss adult movies. I want to hold my husband hand instead of holding a two year old that can walk. I miss drinking (ok not so much but sometimes) I miss that hot sports car that I never had. LOL I miss my old body. And high heel shoes. I miss girls night out with my bf. And dates nights with the hubby.

But even with this long list of things I want and miss there will never be anything that I will want or miss more then this two year old. She is SUPER sassy. Adorably cute. Crazy beautiful. Amazingly smart. My most perfect angel. The best thing I ever did. My answered pray. My whole heart.

Life is busy but better to be busy then bored out of my mind. My husband works a lot but better to work then not work at all. I OWN A BOUTIQUE which is totally awesome!!!! I wish SOME DAYS VERY FEW NEXT TO NO DAYS that I had someone Sean and I could call to keep Eviee. I miss spending that one on one time with my husband but we have NEVER laughed so hard together then when we do with Eviee. I miss adults conversations but listening to "baby peed her pants momma, that's not nice baby" is so much funnier then anything I could come up with. Seeing the LOVE in her eyes when she ask to watch Frozen first thing in the morning is what gets me out of bed faster. I swear sometimes that we will not eat out anymore until she gets older but each walk we make to the bathroom is joy. We can not go by a single table without people smiling or stopping me to tell my how beautiful Eviee is and that melts my heart a thousand times over. Napping through the day is completely over rated! I STILL WANT 8 SOLID HOURS OF SLEEP A NIGHT :) I miss holding his hand everywhere we go, but time will pass so fast and I will not physically be able to hold the sweetest little two year there ever was. I never really was much of a drinker but if I was I suppose I would miss it a little...maybe. You just really don't look cool with a car seat in a sports car. I mean YOU DON'T. And I kinda want one. But you know what. My Nissan Armada my hubby bought me TOTALLY ROCKS YOUR SOCKS OFF AND I LOVE IT AND I WANT ANOTHER ONE JUST IN WHITE :) To have that body again would mean that I never got the chance to be this two year old's momma. Give me all the weight in the world, just leave my baby with me. I worn high heel wedges this weekend and I didn't totally die so I'd say that's a win. My BF is at home with her little family and so am I. We have "late night after two year old is asleep watching to same old movies date nights" and those are way better then going to the movies. I can stay in my yoga pants for those :)

What I'm getting at is this. I do miss some things about life before this two year old. There are things I may never have again. I miss one on one time with my husband and I do think that is important for all married couples. But we have people that would COULD leave her with if we really REALLY wanted to but we don't. WHY? Because. This child is OUR everything and she will not be two years old for long. She will not talk about baby dolls and Frozen for long. She will not wake up several times a night forever. She will not want me to hold her when she is 16. She wont need me to walk her to the potty and wipe her tiny little booty when shes 20. There will be a day all too soon when I don't have to have a large car big enough to fit a car seat. The day will come to fast when I wish Frozen was playing on my T.V ALL DAY LONG. There will be a day when tears stream down my face because I can't hold this two year old anymore, because that two year old of mine now has a two year old of her own. There will be a day the comes rolling in when Sean and I are sitting in our house alone. In silence. Daydreaming about that two year old. Wishing we would have cherish those moments ALL OF THEM more.

I don't have a baby sitter. I don't "let" my child spend the night or two with grandma. I don't have date nights with my husband out often because we have a two year old. Because we wanted this life. Because God is the only one that knows how long we have together as a family of three and we will cherish these moments as long as we can.